You’ve got one life to live. It is up to you if you live it in a prison of negativity and feeling bad or…you can make the decision to have a different life, one filled to the brim with creativity and great relationships. You can decide, right now, to have a life that is based on feeling good and on feeling happy, in spite of your circumstances.
As we discussed in the last post, motivating yourself through criticism, bribery and manipulation has short term results with long term negative consequences. Those negative consequences are to you, your relationships and your creativity.
A Kinder Way to Motivate Yourself
In the previous post, we talked about the “away from” strategy in NLP; the one where a person motivates themselves by moving “away from” pain. Now, let’s talk about a kinder way, that actually works on many levels to accomplish what you want.
The “towards” motivation is a strategy that has you moving in the direction (towards) of what you want. It doesn’t use negativity to motivate you; it uses positive motivations.
Are you familiar with this story? A farmer had a little grey donkey. It was a stubborn little donkey and liked to have it’s own way. The farmer needed to have the donkey hitched up to a plough so that he could till the soil. The farmer got the donkey in its harness and stood on the plow. He told the donkey to go and that donkey, well, he just didn’t want to do it. It was hot outside, the sun was beating down and no way did he want to break a sweat doing the farmer’s dirty work.
The farmer didn’t like to do it but he got out his whip and cracked it in the air. The donkey jumped, startled and moved a little bit but not very far. The farmer continued to do that and the donkey was not going to co-operate.
The farmer’s wife saw all of this happening from her view point as she was weeding their very bountiful garden. She strolled over to the farmer, bearing a large bunch of lush orange carrots complete with the most brilliant green carrot tops. She tied them in a bundle and attached them to a stick.The farmer was quite frustrated at the moment and he was speechless as he watched his wife fasten the stick to the donkey’s harness.
The farmer almost fell off the back of the plow because as soon as his wife finished tying the stick with the carrots up, the donkey quickly moved forward. His wife laughed as she watched the donkey lumbering ahead, his head held high, trying to get the luscious carrots dangling in front of his nose.
…and that is the way you do it…you put something in front of you that is so tempting, so bright, so full of color and life that you MUST go after it…and here is how you find your own “carrots”.
Positive Motivation: A Key Factor in Creativity
There are many ways to motivate yourself through good feelings and positive emotions. Here are a few:
All of these will open up creativity in your life because a brain that is exposed to feel good chemicals through visualization and positive emotions accesses the creative part. This is the place of inspiration where ideas just seem to pop in from no where…yet…they were always there…you just did not have the key to access them…yet…
Your brain will think more quickly instead of being in a stuck state. When that creativity is engaged by good feelings, it is easier to actually visualize what you want. Endorphins are pumped up and life just feels so much better. When you feel better and your creativity is flowing, life is smoother, isn't it?
In that space in your life, relationships flow…disagreements are lessened and those that occur are easily resolved. Make what you want compelling by making the picture of it big…use real pictures, motivational quotes, daydreaming, gratitude journals…whatever is necessary to get those good feelings flowing…
One powerful way is to think of one time in your life when you felt SO good…you know that time…see what you saw, hear what you heard, and FEEL what you felt…and spin it around…and make it bigger, clearer, louder…make it bolder…and squeeze your thumb and first finger together…just like that…then look up and let your fingers go…repeat this process again….then let it go…breathe…
The next time you need to FEEL GOOD, squeeze your thumb and finger together and activate that anchor. Let go of the old way of forcing yourself to do things because you think you must. If they are necessary to accomplish, according to you, find a way to FEEL GOOD about it. A chore that is accomplished in a positive frame of mind is not a chore…is it? Unleash that creativity and see what it brings you in your life and in your relationships…just like that…
“Drive your own life…you deserve to, don’t you?” Sherie Venner
Latest posts by Sherie (see all)
- The Truth About Getting Beyond Survival Mode in a Crisis - April 6, 2014
- Overcoming Emotional Pain: Easy or Not? - March 2, 2014
- If You Can Do This Like A Navy Seal, Then You Can Knock Out Stress - November 3, 2013