Worrying. It is easier said than done to stop worrying for a lot of people. Others seem to go about their day without a seeming worry in the world. Yet, is that true? When we see people smiling and friendly in the grocery store or on Facebook…do you make an assumption that they are fine?
Worrying does not always have to be obvious. That’s right. A person can look like they are carefree and yet, deep inside may be consumed with worry. It might not be in that moment…it might be as they lay in bed at night and replay a scene from the day, over and over again. Yes, that is worry.
Have you heard the expression that a dog worries a bone? It means that it doesn’t let it go…and that is what worry is…an anxious state that is held onto that is not let go of…
This quote by Mark Twain speaks volumes:
“I have spent most of my life worrying about things that have never happened.” Mark Twain.
Has Worrying Become a Problem in Your Life?
Everyone has moments of worry in their lives. We worry when our child is late coming home from a party. We worry when we have lost a job. Life does have worry in it and that is normal. It becomes a problem when it is something we feel we can’t turn off…when it becomes almost a compulsion to think about the same thing over and over again…especially when there is nothing that we could have done to change the outcome.
Worrying, then, at its very worst is a stuck state, like being caught in quicksand. The more you try and get out of it, the worse it gets and the more you sink into the quicksand…until it overwhelms you. The feeling of overwhelm helps you to worry more and the more you worry, the more overwhelmed you feel…and so on…a vicious cycle.
“Our thoughts make us what we are.”― Dale Carnegie Tweet this!
Stopping the Vicious Cycle of Worrying
- Be in the now…in this very moment. When you worry, you are projecting events into the future that may or may not happen.
- Meditate or engage in prayer. Both methods calm and soothe the anxious brain patterns of worry…because you can’t hold onto a worrying thought if you have a calm thought in your mind, can you?
- Rest. Don’t let yourself get too tired, too hungry, too thirsty or too emotionally depleted. Do activities that fill your life with energy, like moderate exercise and work or hobbies that you love.
- Find the joy in the small things. Practice gratitude for something…for anything…when you focus on the good in your life, it is hard to worry.
Worrying is Using Your Imagination Negatively
As an NLP practitioner, one of the habits that I notice people have who worry a lot is that they live in the future in their minds…and not a pleasant future. They are brilliant at creating negative events and because they have such powerful imaginations…it feels so real…
So one of the exercises that I use with those people who have worrying as a problem, is to have them take that negative imagined future…that one that probably would never happen…and make it small and turn the colors down on that picture…and is there a message that they need to see…and if there is…to take the learning’s…and you know…sometimes that worrying has a message for you and for me…and when you hear that message or see it…you don’t need to worry anymore…because you can make a decision to do something about that situation…and if there is nothing that you can do…you can just let it go…because worrying doesn’t fix anything, does it…doing something does…that’s right…
And when you look behind that worrying for any positive intentions, you might see some….and you might not…whatever you do…your future can be bright…so imagine what your future would look like…if it was bright…and shiny…yes…just like that…
So take these simple steps and turn the dial down on any worrying that might be left…because you can…
“Drive your own life…you deserve to, don’t you?” Sherie Venner
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