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Why You Don’t Get What You Want

If you are Ask for what you want and be prepared to get it Maya Angelounot getting what you want, there is a reason why. It might be more than one reason.

Imagine…you are sitting in a room…a brightly lit room…thinking about what you want.

And the thing is, you might really, really want it. You have tried a number of different things. You have visualized, affirmed, fussed, worried, chanted…and more.

If you have been doing the following three things, it’s no wonder that you don’t have want you want…yet…

3 Reasons You Don’t Get What You Want

Reason #1: Tolerating less than what you want

When I first moved into our house, I was thrilled with our master bedroom. There is a large walk in closet and a beautiful ensuite with a soaker tub and a standalone shower.

I was meticulous, keeping that bathroom and bedroom clean. I made sure that the dirty clothes went into the clothes hamper. Then, a few months later, I got a terrible flu that lasted for more than one week.

During that time, I let the bathroom and the bedroom slide.

There was a small pile of clothes in the corner that were seasonal clothes. I intended to put them in a box and label them for short term storage. Because I was sick, I didn’t get around to it…the pile of clothes stayed there for that week…and then another week…and then another week…

I didn’t want the clothes there…but they were there…and because they were…they became familiar…and I tolerated them. So, it took a massive effort for me to get back on track and get those clothes boxed up, labelled and put away.

The same thing happens with negative habits that we have. They have been around for a long time and they become comfortable…so we tolerate them…we might think that we want one thing…but because we tolerate what we don’t want…we lose momentum.

Reason #2: Not Making a Decision

When the clothes were just lying there in that pile, I wasn’t making a decision to go forward and do something about it. Here is what I could have done to get what I wanted.

List the pros and cons of making that decision. Take a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle of the page. On one side, list the pros (the positives) to making that decision. On the other side, make a list of the reasons against making that decision (the cons).

Reason #3: Lack of Focus

Get a clear picture of what you want. I mean that. Often, when you don’t get what you want, it’s because your vision, literally how you see the future in regards to this part of it, is out of focus. It is blurry.

Sharpen that vision of your future, of that decision…even if it is something as simple as a pile of clothes in the corner…make that picture bright, clear, shining…and you will actually feel pulled to make it come true in reality.

With that pile of clothes, I made a mental list (because it was just a small thing, wasn’t it?) of the pros and cons. I saw that I had been tolerating it. I made a mental picture….a clear, bright, focused mental picture of what that corner of the room would look like…with that pile of clothes gone…put into its proper place in storage…

And before I knew it, I was able to just go and do it…without feeling bad…or tolerating it anymore…and it is the same way with other aspects of our lives.

So take a look at what you are tolerating…in yourself or in your relationships…and realize that you can have what you want…and it can be this simple…yes…it really can…

“Ask for what you want and be prepared to get it!”- Maya Angelou

“Drive your own life…you deserve to, don’t you?” Sherie Venner

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I am a Relationship Coach who helps others create happy, healthy, loving relationships…including the relationship they have with themselves…by breaking through those blocks and barriers to success. I use various techniques gathered through training as a Master Practitioner of NLP, timeline, hypnosis and common sense gathered through life experience.

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  • Eva Blaskovic November 7, 2012, 10:58 pm

    Reason #1: Tolerating less than what you want – This is probably one of the most detrimental, yet most overlooked, reasons. It takes many people decades to figure out this problem, including me, and by then we may be trapped where we don’t want to be. Thanks for pointing it out. Of course, #2 and #3 are significant as well, but I found those easier to identify and master.
    Eva Blaskovic recently posted..Do We Understand the Value of Custom Work?My Profile

    • Sherie November 7, 2012, 11:15 pm

      I think that reason #1 is probably the one that packs the most punch. It can take a lot of time to figure that one out but once you see it…bam! Thanks so much for commenting and sharing, Eva!!