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Is It Wise to Keep Your Goals Secret?

Goals aregoals are important important to have. Yes. Most definitely.

When you’re in a relationship, shared goals are important, too, as well as the ones you have individually.

But what about sharing those weight loss goals, business goals, financial goals before they are a reality with large numbers of people? Is that a good idea?

I had the wonderful experience of attending a training seminar to become a Master NLP  practitioner. One of the exercises we were invited to do was to go up to the front and share our income goals, if we wanted to. Now, many people did…in fact, most of them did.

Yet, strangely, I felt that I shouldn’t do it. At the time, I wasn’t sure why. I’ts just that it didn’t feel right to me, to go up in front of the group and say that affirmation of how much income I would be earning by next year.

So, I didn’t. I didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about it either. I like to pay attention to those gut feelings that I have and act on them. Because even though I don’t know the reason for it, there is one.

A  year later, I found out the reason.

Keeping Your Goals to Yourself is an Important Step to Actually Achieving Them

Yes. My gut feelings were right. If you keep your personal goals to yourself, you stand a much better chance of reaching them. When you announce them to the world or your group, you get a sense of achievement…a feeling of already having reached that goal. Then, you lose momentum. ..and as we all know, momentum is important for getting those goals done!

Here is an amazing TED talk by Derek Sivers that explains it…so well! Please take a moment and watch it. It’s not very long and can be life changing for you!

How many of you have had this experience? You’ve started a brand new diet and you announce to the world that you’re going to lose X number of pounds. You feel euphoric just saying that and there is that feeling of accomplishment. The problem is that our brains then think that we have done that. Our friends pat us on the back, tell us we’re doing a good job…well, you know how that goes.

So, next time you have a major goal, if you do feel the need to share it, do so carefully. Watch the words that you use when you say it. Feel the emotions. If you can say it in a way that you don’t generate the feelings of achievement, you will be further ahead!

This does go against conventional advice to make a public commitment to goals. What are your thoughts?

“Drive your own life…you deserve to, don’t you?”  Sherie Venner


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I am a Relationship Coach who helps others create happy, healthy, loving relationships…including the relationship they have with themselves…by breaking through those blocks and barriers to success. I use various techniques gathered through training as a Master Practitioner of NLP, timeline, hypnosis and common sense gathered through life experience.

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Mike Huiwitz September 23, 2013, 8:05 am

    I find it easy to achieve my goals when I keep them a secret. But I make sure to create a to-do list. So I won’t be sidetracked.

  • Carolyn Hughes July 3, 2013, 5:33 am

    I think intuition isn’t wonderful. Holding back is sometimes the right thing to do. I watched the video and it does go against the generally held belief that if you tell someone you are doing something you are more likely to do it. After seeing this, I think it’s a balance of being careful who you tell. Telling others who can support and encourage you, or telling someone you hold in high esteem can help motivate you. For example, I belong to a slimming club to help me keep to my target weight, because it really does help me in those moments of temptation to know that I shared my goal and I have to return to confirm whether or not I achieved it.
    Interesting perspective Sherie!
    Carolyn Hughes recently posted..Shooting for the moon.My Profile

    • Sherie July 3, 2013, 7:50 pm

      I think you do need to pay attention to the circumstances. Your example of being in a supportive atmosphere, where you feel safe and motivated is great, Carolyn. Thanks so much for your comment and dropping by to read the post, Carolyn!
      Sherie recently posted..Warning! Keep Your Goals Secret!My Profile

  • MamaRed July 2, 2013, 4:45 pm

    Oh, had soooooo not thought it this way Sherie! Thanks bunches.
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